Reader’s Question

I need help. My daughter’s boyfriend is a manipulator, and my husband and I don’t care for him. Our daughter said don’t bother coming here if you don’t like him. We read your article on manipulators that you have on the site. That is very good. We see a lot of the boyfriend. Thank you to be there. I need an answer. I’m very hurt.

Canada

Our Clinical Psychologist’s Reply

The article entitled Identifying Losers in Relationships on this website describes the techniques used by controllers, abusers, and manipulative individuals. I have another article entitled Love and Stockholm Syndrome. It’s available on this website as well. It looks at ways to deal with a controlling and manipulative individual in the family. I would also recommend reviewing the discussion groups on Losers and Stockholm Syndrome on this website. Your situation is not unusual. You’ll need to maintain contact with her at a safe distance. That will allow you to maintain contact with your daughter as well as reminding the manipulator that you’re still there, watching the situation as parents.