Reader’s Question

I have had a longstanding love/hate relationship with airplanes and flight, one that has puzzled me for many years. The best way I can describe it is that I feel something like a reincarnation of a pilot who died in an airplane crash. In other words, I have a concomitant affinity and anxiety for aviation. One the one hand, I have nearly completed my own pilot license and find myself staring at airplanes in the sky when I am relaxing in my backyard. On the other hand, I have had countless dreams in which I view (but am never involved in) airplane disasters. I am hesitant to take my young child on commercial flights for fear of an accident. I will watch documentaries about airline disasters and then go flying myself all within hours of each other.

My family and friends have not had any involvement with planes or flying. While this issue has not had a major impact on my day to day life, some interpretation of the conflicting emotions would be greatly appreciated!

Our Clinical Psychologist’s Reply

I suspect you have a strong interest in ALL aspects of flight, ranging from the positive to the negative (airline disasters). Your interest in the negative aspects of flight, such as airline disasters, is producing your anxiety and fears of safety for your family. Emotionally, we feel what we think about, and it doesn’t matter if those thoughts are real or fantasy/daydream. Where do these dreams and anxieties come from…? You’re an individual who watches documentaries about airline disasters. Your participation in flight school and actual flying makes those documentaries more real to you, probably producing the dreams. You’ll notice in the dream that you’re viewing airplane disasters, just like the documentaries.

Your situation is actually not uncommon. All areas of personal interest have positive and negative aspects and sometimes, the negative is very attractive to us. You’ll find the majority of individuals interested in high-speed auto racing enjoy driving and driving fast. Yet it’s not the 500 miles in a left turn that’s exciting…it’s that an accident may happen…just like when they are driving fast.

By engaging in your interest in the negative or dangerous aspects of flight, your imagination is creating “emotional memories” that contain anxiety or tension. The brain doesn’t know if these memories are true or daydreaming. These memories can trigger anxiety or tension when such feelings are inappropriate. By thinking about flight during the day, including the disasters, this ensures that your dreams will contain a similar theme.

While the negative side of flight may be exciting, I’d recommend that you emphasize the positive, joyful aspects of flight. In your hobby as a pilot, you don’t want to have a brain full of negative, disaster, accident-oriented emotional memories that may be triggered during real life flight. This situation is depicted in the movie “Top Gun” when an intrusive recollection of a flight disaster is triggered during the middle of air combat. The hero, Tom Cruise, is temporarily disorganized by the experience…and that’s not good.

Instead of visualizing how an air accident may occur, visualize and replay your flight training and safety procedures. Make those thoughts and memories your focus. You’ll feel a lot more comfortable about flying.