Pregnant, Stressed and Depressed
Reader’s Question
My question is how can I deal with all the stress I’ve been having while I’m pregnant?
I can’t get my boyfriend to understand that because I’m struggling with depression and because of the stress of the pregnancy, I’m on edge. I’m not the real me right now. I’m in my third trimester. My little sister died in a car wreck 3 weeks ago, adding to my stress and depression. To top it off, my boyfriend left me because of how I’ve been acting lately. I’ve also lost my job until after I have my child, so I’m financially stressed too. My doctor just put me on antidepressants, but they haven’t really begun to take effect yet. What can I do? I’m an independent woman in love.
Our Clinical Psychologist’s Reply
These are trying times for you indeed and it would certainly appear that your needs go far beyond the advice you might receive in just this forum. Keep in close touch with your doctor and stay on a plan to resolve your depression and stress. But beyond that, consider that a truly “independent” woman might not be so inclined to compound her stress with the pain of “love” for a guy who bailed on her during an understandably difficult time both financially and emotionally. If you have any other more reliable sources of support (e.g., family, friends, etc.) it would probably be a good time to turn to them as opposed to concerning yourself with your boyfriend and why he doesn’t seem to appreciate what you’re going through right now.
The stresses you’ve had recently are major ones, indeed. And you are very correct to note that you are probably not yourself because of all the stress and depression. So, focus on staying healthy and getting well. Your boyfriend might never come to “understand.” You don’t have power over that. Only maturity and soundness of character can help him think more reasonably about the lives of his partner and child. Now is the time for you as an “independent” woman to take really good care of yourself, for your own sake as well as that of your child.
